I thought this was already solved...

Didn't Godzilla take care of this back in the 60's? Or was that just in Japan?
Moth threatens to turn China's 'Green Olympics' brown

Things that will ruin your Hawaiian vacation

Sunburn
High gas prices
Too many mai tais
Poi
Rip tide
Inability to pronounce "Humuhumunukunukuapuaa"
Beach closed due to sewage spill

Who knew?

"Apple Computer Inc. is on the defensive in Europe for the second time in as many weeks as the company prepares to battle The Beatles' record label for its right to distribute music in the United Kingdom's highest court."

Who knew there was a market for distributing music in the UK's highest court? That Steve Jobs, he's always pushing the edge.

Yes, yes it did.

"[Police] also say the oil made it hard for them to get a good grip on him."

Naked, Oily Man Attacks Police With Nunchucks

Six Busted in Wet T-Shirt Contest

Two things...first, I'd say anyone "six busted" would probably lose the contest anyway, 'cause that's just not natural.

Second, here's the last paragraph: "Also charged were: Louis Adrian Green, 34, of Essixville, Michigan, Christopher Scott, 21 of Saginaw, Michigan, Dianna Chang , 23 of Naperville, Illinois, and an Illinois man was charged with resisting an officer without violence." So what's the deal with the Illinois guy? Who'd he pay off so they wouldn't mention his name?

Must-see TV

'The Simpsons' to Show Live-Action Opening

"'I'm just amazed there are people who want to be known for looking like the Simpsons,' said Al Jean, the show's executive producer."

Amen to that, Al! I've almost got Homer's hair, and I definitely have the gut...I'll have to stock up on the white polo shirts, though.

I think we've been dissed...

From everyone's favorite news source, The Onion: Ichiro: 'The Best Part About Playing For My Country Was Not Playing For The Seattle Mariners'

Then again, that might actually be true!

Finally, a gadget I DON'T need!

Sure, the running thing has led to a gadget or two...I've got the Garmin GPS thingy, at some point I'll get a hydration belt, but I'm glad to say I don't need a pair of shoes with a built-in MP3 player.

It rarely gets better than this...

And by "It" I mean the opening paragraphs of this story: "ATASCADERO, Calif. - A retired salesman alleged a stripper and her friend beat and robbed him in his home. John Skinner, 54, said he was on his way to Bible study on Jan. 23 when exotic dancer Maureen Murphy, 25, knocked on his door and offered him a free strip-o-gram.

"Murphy said a friend had already paid for the show, police said.

"When Skinner agreed to let her perform, knife wielding Richard Adam, 23, allegedly forced his way inside and told Skinner he owed Murphy, owner of Bikini Assassins, and another woman money for earlier services."

It has it all: An older dude presumably not getting much and resorting to escort services; Bible study; knives; and most importantly, Bikini Assassins.

But the best part comes later, when Bible-studying Skinner says "he owed Talbert money for sex one time but not for a previous time when he said she fell asleep before they could have sex."

As I said, it's got it all.

My almost but not quite brush with death

Or at least injury. Or the injury of a cop. One of those...

Anyway, as I was heading home yesterday I stopped (well, the guy two cars ahead of me stopped) to let the officer involved in this North Seattle collision go through the intersection at 105th and Aurora. Which means that about the time I was rolling through the intersection he was plowing into / being plowed into by the other car.

A bittersweet sports day

The bitter: Kirby Puckett dead at 45 following a stroke. I loved Kirby. He was everything I wished I could be as an outfielder: a good hitter with decent range and a fair arm. And he was pudgy. Gotta love a pudgy baseball player.




The sweet: the Seahawks signed Sean Alexander to an 8-year deal. While I have my issues with Sean (he has a tendency to dance around rather than just hitting the hole and running up field) I do love to watch him run the open field. Now that this deal is done it's time for the team to get Hutch under contract. Like, oh, now.

What, no frickin' laser beams?

Pentagon mulling 'stealth sharks' to patrol the seas

Sharks with neural implants? What could possibly go wrong?