From the people who brought you the Duct Tape Chemical Attack Safety Plan

Your friends at FEMA, or Homeland Security, or whatever Government Agency is in charge of the next major panic would like you to remain calm and review the safety instructions at PandemicFlu.gov.

There, you will learn that the Government's Pandemic Planning Assumptions are "based largely on the 1918 influenza epidemic"

You'll also learn that, for example, Washington State "will receive $1,990,994 from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) to use for pandemic planning activities." Glad they didn't round that up to an even $1,991,000 for us... (find out what YOUR state is getting here)